Not My Guy

Jerry Jones is mental if he signs Adam "Pacman" Jones.

Apparently, Dallas has upped their offer for Pacman after Tennessee rejected their initial proposal of a late-round draft pick, adding an unnamed player to the mix. I don't blame the Titans for wanting more. Pacman was, after all, the 6th overall pick in the 2005 draft. But make no mistake, Tennessee wants him gone, and they know they're not going to get equal on-field value for him.

There's no denying Pacman's skills between the lines. He's a game-changer; a shutdown corner and an electrifying punt returner. In a vacuum, he would be a valuable asset to the Cowboys. But this ain't no vacuum, and his numerous run-ins with the law (6 arrests since May 2005) are reality. It's not worth ruining a cohesive locker room for a guy that has proven to be anything but trustworthy and accountable. Cancer, I believe, is the word I'm looking for.

It's priorities, that's all. Pretty simple. I think Pacman's list goes something like this:

1. Party 
   
2. Anything but football
3. Football

And that's his choice. This is America, but if I was Jerry Jones, he ain't on America's team. 

Report: Pacman to Cowboys "Imminent" 

Cowboys Sweeten Offer for Pacman

He's Going Nuts and Ribbeting!

It usually pains me to watch sports coverage on local network affiliates, but this highlight of the first round thriller between Duke and Belmont from NBC 17 in North Carolina is fantastic. The chicken cracks me up.

So it's not fantastic, but it's better than the typical shmo trying to do a basketball highlight when it's obvious to everyone but him that he's never watched a game in his life. "Duke wins the match!"

My 2008 NCAA Tournament Picks

Final Four:

 I love the senior leadership of guards Chris Lofton and JaJuan Smith. And they're lethal from distance, combining for 186 3-pointers during the regular season. Tennessee's ability to consistently hit the trey makes them extremely dangerous because they can quickly dig themselves out of holes, or put their opponents in one. The Volunteers are deep and they play without a conscious. The key to their run will be the effectiveness of sophomore forward Tyler Smith. 

 The Jayhawks lead the nation in scoring margin (21 ppg), and they do it with a deep, talented roster that shares the wealth inside and out. Leading scorer Darrell Arthur is a monster in the paint if he can stay out of foul trouble. Kansas plays suffocating defense; they led the Big 12 in scoring defense, blocked shots, steals, and defensive field goal percentage. It's time coach Bill Self and the Jayhawks shed their recent tournament curse and live up to their potential as a Final Four team.

 UCLA has been to the Final Four the last 2 years, and now they have the inside presence of Pac-10 freshman and player of the year Kevin Love, who can also step back and shoot the 3. PG Darren Collison is lightening-fast, and loves to create in the lane. The Bruins have shown the ability to lock down on D in key spots, and their favorable road to San Antonio makes them the obvious choice out of the West. The health of glue guy Luc Richard Mbah a Moute's sprained left ankle will be a key factor in whether or not the Bruins cut down the nets in San Antonio.

 Texas has already beaten Kansas, Tennessee, and UCLA (my 3 other Final Four teams) this season. The Initials--D.J. Augustin and A.J. Abrams--make up the best backcourt and the scariest 1-2 punch in the tournament. Coach Rick Barnes relies heavily on Augustin, especially in crunch time, and Abrams is a deadly spot-up shooter. Forward Damien James is a banger in the paint, and he will have to carry some of the load offensively for the Longhorns to go all the way. 

Final Two:

National Champion:

Awkward, Baby! With a Capital A!

Robert Montgomery Knight looked like he was ready to kick Richard J. Vitale's head off. I only wish Vitale was in-studio so Knight could have choked him out.

That was exactly the sort of awkwardness that I was talking about in this post. Rece Davis did a great job utilizing the kiss-ass comment as a tension-breaker. And how many times have we seen Digger touch Bobby in the last 5 days? About 11,256 times, I'd say. Somewhere in there. 

Bracket Fever

I, like most of you, will get absolutely no work done this week. I relish this time; a time when brackets take priority over all. There's something liberating about not caring for anything but a piece of paper with 65 universities and 4 regions on it. It inspires genuine enthusiasm across the country.

Right now, my brackets are empty. The box in the middle is empty. They're filled with opportunity, though. They're ripe with potential. This piece of paper is my vehicle for showing everyone that I'm smarter than them. That I saw the upset before it happened. The ultimate "I told ya so." Tangible, irrefutable proof of superiority. It's sport epitomized in bracket form.

This is what it's all about. The excitement, the drama, the intrigue, the passion. It's madness, and I love it. 

One Sentence Says It All

Tiger Woods is not human. I mean seriously. I can't write anything that hasn't been said, but I feel compelled to write something. That birdie putt on 18 was unreal. It was the first time in 7 years that he's had to nail a bird on the final hole to win a tournament, which is just another testament to how incredible he's been. Go Tiger.

User Pick 6: Friday

Joe Lunardi lost to his 9 year-old daughter in an office pool last year. Joey Brackets my...(USA Today)

Gotta love Gatorade's "League of Clutch" ad campaign. Sidney Crosby is the latest to be immortalized. (Fanhouse)

Top NCAAB coaches give their tournament favorites. Ben Howland picks UCLA. (Sports Illustrated)

The FBI is monitoring Facebook for illegal NCAA tournament gambling. Didn't I send that application to everybody last week? (Sporting News)

Gus Johnson reads the criticism, and it hurts his heart. I love you Gus! (Deadspin)

Golf Analyst David Feherty was hit by a truck. "He didn't want to hit the car on the left, so he ran over the cyclist on the right," Feherty said. (ESPN)

Moneyball 2.0

My 2008 Yahoo! fantasy baseball team has been drafted. Leave a comment and let me know how astoundingly inept you think I am...  

Round	Pick	Player	Position
1.	(6)	Matt Holliday	OF
2.	(15)	Johan Santana	SP
3.	(26)	Ichiro Suzuki	OF
4.	(35)	B.J. Upton	2B,OF
5.	(46)	Russell Martin	C
6.	(55)	Travis Hafner	1B
7.	(66)	Rafael Furcal	SS
8.	(75)	Ryan Zimmerman	3B
9.	(86)	Chris Young	SP
10.	(95)	Jason Bay	OF
11.	(106)	Kelvim Escobar	SP
12.	(115)	Paul Konerko	1B
13.	(126)	A.J. Burnett	SP
14.	(135)	Howie Kendrick	2B
15.	(146)	Kosuke Fukudome	OF
16.	(155)	Joe Borowski	RP
17.	(166)	Ian Snell	SP
18.	(175)	Andruw Jones	OF
19.	(186)	Geovany Soto	C
20.	(195)	Derek Lowe	SP
21.	(206)	Evan Longoria	3B
22.	(215)	Todd Jones	RP
23.	(226)	Gary Matthews Jr.	OF

My Quick Smells Like French Toast

French toast? I did not see Pete Carroll coming.

View the 60-second version here. Or I guess you could just scroll down. Either way, man. They both work, so I guess it's up to you. Make the right choice. I'm going to bed.